Tales From the Darkside

For a period during its existence the Phoenix Jazzmen were playing about 3 to 4 times weekly. The band members at the time were Ronnie Young, Graham Shephard, Gordon Solomon, John Hedley, Gordon Sumner and Don Eddy (pictured). 

On one memorable occasion we were booked to play at a large club in central Middlesbrough. The club's resident band comprised organ and drums, and the organist was a very attractive lady. Our drummer Don Eddy, recently divorced, took a fancy to her, and offered her a lift home at the end of the night, conveniently forgetting that he was a passenger in my car. Anyhow I reluctantly agreed and we set off to her place, which turned out to be a flat above a fruit and veg shop in the town.

It was a cold night, and she suggested that I should wait in the shop while Don and her went upstairs to "have a cup of tea", as she put it. So I accepted, and during the wait I realised that I was hungry, so I helped myself to a banana. 

At this point a burly figure loomed up at the door, and a torch was switched on, to reveal me standing in the dark with the banana. It was, of course, the local constabulary doing his rounds, and he demanded an explanation. So I told him the truth, and just as I finished the explanation the loud and rhythmic squeak of bedsprings came unmistakably through the ceiling. "Ah!" said Plod, "that'll be him drinking his tea now. I'll return in ten minutes, and if you and your tea drinking friend aren't gone you'll be in real trouble".

Needless to say we were long gone when he returned. Gordon Solomon.