Cheltenham Musings 2

In an underground lair somewhere someone is being tortured to design the most uncomfortable seat capable of accommodating the human body. Sacked from Ryanair they now work making chairs for the Jazz Arena at Cheltenham. Wafer thin foam covering accompanies a rigid steel frame cunningly placed just too close to the chair in front. I will say no more.

Steve and I went looking for the sales tent to stock up on CDs as we did last year but were told by a Steward that there wasn’t one this year. This is a serious missed sales opportunity. Last Year Steve spent three figures and came out piled up like the fat mouse in Cinderella and I broke into a twenty pound note. I only saw two acts with merchandise on sale, Nubiyan Twist, (who had released a new album on the Friday of the Festival) and Theo Croker who brought some LPs to sell and sign. I assume everyone else was making too much money from playing jazz and didn’t need the income. 

Stagecraft was an issue that Steve raised a couple of times. Some people thought that shouting “Yeah” would do the trick whilst Brad Mehldau played with his back to the audience. (I’m looking forward to seeing Brad in Panto – “Where’s the audience Brad? IT’S BEHIND YOU”).

Some people just oozed charisma, even reaching to the back of the hall, especially Dee Dee Bridgewater. Fatoumata Diawara was just terrifying that close up but magnificent and stunning at the same time and she had these great ornate bands round her upper arms which looked like a perfect solution to bingo wings.

There was a lot of non-jazz on but it was good to catch up with some acts I liked but had hitherto not seen live (Orchestra Baobab and Fatoumata Diawara). Some of the non-jazz helps to pay for the rest of the Festival and I enjoyed having a beer and listening to Robert Plant whilst stood outside the big tent on Saturday night.

I struggled with un.procedure plus, the only act we saw in the Parabola Arts Centre where the less commercial, more progressive jazz performers appear. They weren’t helped by the fact that saxophonist Cassie Kinoshi was stranded in Berlin. Their music was a commissioned piece that reminded me of the days when Mart would bring in a prog-rock classic to play in the common room. They were always called something like Mercury in Retrograde by a group called something like Shibboleth and the rest of us would go outside to play football. In the rain. The performance was accompanied by a cinematic backdrop of red spheres, grey circular plains and corridors of light.

Finally, for all you pop-pickers, here’s a quick rundown of the best that we saw and heard.

Best Acts of the Cheltenham Jazz Festival

1.    1. Dee Dee Bridgewater

2.   2. Lakecia Benjamin

3.   3. Orchestra Baobab

4.   4. Fatoumata Diawara

5.   5. Zara McFarlane

6.   6. Brad Mehldau

7.   7. Nubiyan Twist

8.   8. Beatroot

9.   9. Theo Croker

1   10. un.procedure plus

1   11.  No Big Deal

11 12. Alice Russell

Dave Sayer