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Bebop Spoken There

Ambrose Akinmusire: “ I am certainly always aware of what the masses are doing. And when I see too many people going one way, I'm going another way - even when I don't know what's over that way". DownBeat, March, 2024.

The Things They Say!

Hudson Music: Lance's "Bebop Spoken Here" is one of the heaviest and most influential jazz blogs in the UK.

Rupert Burley (Dynamic Agency): "BSH just goes from strength to strength".

'606' Club: "A toast to Lance Liddle of the terrific jazz blog 'Bebop Spoken Here'"

The Strictly Smokin' Big Band included Be Bop Spoken Here (sic) in their 5 Favourite Jazz Blogs.

Ann Braithwaite (Braithwaite & Katz Communications) You’re the BEST!

Holly Cooper, Mouthpiece Music: "Lance writes pull quotes like no one else!"

Simon Spillett: A lovely review from the dean of jazz bloggers, Lance Liddle...

Josh Weir: I love the writing on bebop spoken here... I think the work you are doing is amazing.

Postage

16287 (and counting) posts since we started blogging 16 years ago. 169 of them this year alone and, so far, 41 this month (Mar 18).

From This Moment On ...

March

Tue 19: Jam session @ The Black Swan, Newcastle. 7:30pm. Free. House trio: Michael Young, Paul Grainger, Tim Johnston.

Wed 20: Vieux Carré Jazzmen @ Cullercoats Crescent Club. 1:00pm. Free.
Wed 20: Darlington Big Band @ Darlington & Simpson Rolling Mills Social Club, Darlington. 7:00pm. Free. Rehearsal session (open to the public).
Wed 20: Take it to the Bridge @ The Globe, Newcastle. 7:30pm. Free.

Thu 21: Vieux Carré Jazzmen @ The Holystone, Whitley Road, North Tyneside. 1:00pm. Free.
Thu 21: Castillo Neuvo Trio + Conor Emery & His ‘Bones Band @ The Grove, Ouseburn, Newcastle. 7:30pm (7:00pm doors). £10.00. (£7.00. student).
Thu 21: Remi Banklyn + Chris Corcoran Trio @ The Globe, Newcastle. 8:00pm. £12.50. Chicago blues. An International Guitar Foundation promotion.
Thu 21: Merlin Roxby @ Prohibition Bar, Newcastle. 8:00pm. A ‘Jar on the Bar’ gig. Ragtime piano.
Thu 21: Tees Hot Club @ Dorman’s Club, Middlesbrough. 8:30pm.

Fri 22: Vasilis Xenopoulos & Paul Edis @ The Gala, Durham. 1:00pm. £8.00. SOLD OUT!
Fri 22: Classic Swing @ Cullercoats Crescent Club. 1:00pm. Free.
Fri 22: Rendezvous Jazz @ The Monkseaton Arms. 1:00pm. Free.
Fri 22: New Orleans Preservation Jazz Band @ The Oxbridge Hotel, Stockton. 1:00pm. £5.00.
Fri 22: Nauta + Remy CB + Last Orders @ Hoochie Coochie, Newcastle. 8:30pm (7:30pm doors). Free.
Fri 22: Vasilis Xenopoulos-Paul Edis Quartet @ Traveller’s Rest, Darlington. 8:00pm. £15.00. Opus 4 Jazz Club.
Fri 22: Redwell @ Prohibition Bar, Newcastle. 8:00pm. A ‘Jar on the Bar’ gig.

Sat 23: Jambone @ The Glasshouse, Gateshead. 6:30pm. Free (ticketed). End of term performance in the Northern Rock Foundation Hall.
Sat 23: Milne-Glendinning Band @ The Vault, Darlington. 7:00pm. Free.
Sat 23: Red Kites Jazz @ Rowlands Gill Community Centre NE39 1JB. 7:00pm. Tickets: £12.00. (gibsidecommunityfarm@gmail.com). A ‘Build a Barn’ fundraiser. BYOB, tea/coffee available.
Sat 23: New Century Ragtime Orchestra @ Gosforth Civic Theatre, Newcastle. 7:30pm. £20.00. + bf (book in person at venue - no booking fee!). Featuring pianist Martin Litton.
Sat 23: Pete Tanton’s Cuba Libre @ Prohibition Bar, Newcastle. 8:00pm. A ‘Jar on the Bar’ gig.

Sun 24: Musicians Unlimited @ Park Inn, Hartlepool. 1:00pm. Free.
Sun 24: More Jam @ The Globe, Newcastle. 2:30pm. Free.
Sun 24: Luis Verde @ Queen’s Hall, Hexham. 3:00pm. Verde (alto sax); Joe Steels (guitar); John Pope (double bass); John Hirst (drums). Alto sax brilliance!
Sun 24: Elsie Franklin @ The Globe, Newcastle. 3:00pm. £10.00. Country blues. An International Guitar Foundation promotion.
Sun 24: 4B @ The Ticket Office, Whitley Bay Metro Station. 3:00pm. Free.
Sun 24: Las Vegas Live with the Rat Pack @ The Forum, Billingham.
Sun 24: Ian Millar & Dominic Spencer @ Otterburn Memorial Hall. 7:30pm. £12.00.
Sun 24: Lindsay Hannon: Tom Waits for No Man @ Prohibition Bar, Newcastle. 7:00pm. A ‘Jar on the Bar’ gig. Note start time - 7:00pm.
Sun 24: Bold Big Band @ The Globe, Newcastle. 8:00pm.

Mon 25: Harmony Brass @ Cullercoats Crescent Club. 1:00pm. Free.
Mon 25: Michael Young Trio @ The Engine Room, Sunderland. 6:30pm. Free.

Sunday, May 05, 2013

Bassic Laughter

Alan Rudd sent me these bass-playing jokes. Many of them have been around awhile and previously applied to drummers, banjoists, guitarists, viola players and oboists but they're still worth a chuckle. Thanks Alan. – Lance.
Did you hear about the bassist who was so out of tune his band noticed?
What do you call it when two bassists play in unison?
A minor second.
Why couldn't the bassist get through the front door?
He couldn’t find the key and didn't know when to come in!
A Bass Teacher is excited about getting a new, young student. The kid is comes in for his first lesson and learns all the notes on the E string. Next week he comes in and the instructor shows him all of the notes on the A string. The third week comes, the teacher is waiting, but the kid never shows up. Annoyed, he calls him to see where he is. The kid picks up and says, "Oh, sorry man, I got a gig..."
Why can’t bassists tell jokes? Timing.
Did you hear about the drummer who locked his keys in his car?
It took him four hours to get the bass player out.
How many bassists does it take to change a lightbulb?
Just one, but the guitarist has to show him how to do it first.
A man goes on a vacation to a tropical island. As soon as the plane lands, he gets off and hears drumming.  At first, he thinks, “This is pretty cool”. He ends up going to a luau and hears the drumming. He eats lunch and hears the drums. He goes to the beach and hears the drums. He tries to sleep, but can't because of the constant drumming.
The drumming goes on for four days. The guy has to go down to the front desk because he can't sleep. He asks the manager “What is the deal with these drums! Make them stop. I haven't got any sleep this whole week!”
The manager of the hotel says “No. Drums don't stop. You don't want the drums to stop, sir.”
“Why?”
“Because when drums stop… Bass solo begins!”
What's the difference between a bass and an onion?
Nobody cries when you chop up a bass
What do you throw a drowning bass player?
His amp. 
How many Pop bass players does it take to change a light bulb?
None. The keyboard player does it with his left hand. 
What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?
A Bass Player. 
What do a bass and a lawsuit have in common?
Everyone is relieved when the case is closed
What's the difference between a Jazz bassist & a large pizza??
The pizza can feed a family of 4
What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a bassist?
The vacuum cleaner has to be plugged in to suck 
What do you call a bass player in a 3-piece suit? The Defendant.
What do you call a bass player with a job? The pizza delivery boy.
What do you call a bass player without a girlfriend? Homeless.
How do you get a bass player to turn down? Put sheet music in front of him
The guitarist hears screaming and yelling, runs into the rehearsal room and finds the bass player and the drummer fighting. He calms them down enough to find out what's going on and the bass player says "He turned one of my tuning machines and made the bass out of tune!!"  The guitarist asks "Well, why don't you just retune it?" The bassist replies "He won't tell me which one!!!!"
What's the difference between a mutual fund and a bass player? The mutual fund will eventually mature and earn money.
A little boy sees a live band, and is mesmerized by the feeling of the lows coming from the bass player. It's all he talks about for days, until he tells his parents "I want to grow up and become a bass player!!!!" His father says "Son, you'll have to make a choice, you can't do both."
Guy walks around a pawn shop checking out the various instruments. Finally walks up to the proprietor and asks: how much for the big red accordion under the window? The owner replies: You must be a bassist. How do you know?! Because that's a radiator
St. Peter was checking in three recently departed souls. "What did you do on Earth?" he asked the first one. "I was a surgeon; I helped the lame to walk." "Go right in through the Pearly Gates," said St. Peter. "What did you do on Earth?" he asked the second one. "I was a teacher; I taught the blind to see." "Go right in through the Pearly Gates," said St. Peter."And what did you do on Earth?" he asked the third one. "I was a musician; I brought joy to sad people." "Good--you can load in through the kitchen," said St. Peter
Why don't bass players ever catch a cold? 
Even a virus has some pride
Why are there bass solos? 
So the audience has something to talk over 

*:) happy

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